If the stars dont shine, if the moon wont rise, if I never see the setting sun again, You wont hear me cry, this I testify; please believe me, boy, you know I wouldnt lie. As long as there is...

The Bunny Chronicles

Anything less than mad, passionate, extraordinary love is a waste of time. There are too many mediocre things in life to deal with, and love shouldnt be one of them. ― Tiffanie DeBartolo

Dear Blog,

I had forgotten all about you... so sorry my lover... xoxo jb

The Bunny Chronicles

It has been said time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens, but its never gone.
-Rose Kennedy

The Bunny Chronicles

Now I lay me down to pass out wasted, again. Guess that makes this the seventh time this week.

Good Fucking Bye

Dear work, see you never. Last day party time neck punch. Fuck yes.

The Bunny Chronicles

Its Always Sunny

I QUIT

See you never fuckholes... well, after Friday, see you never... Bahaha.

Real Women Drink Whiskey

Last summer, I met one of my guy friends at a bar in midtown Manhattan. He ordered a Bud Light; I ordered a Jameson on the rocks. "Damn," he said, looking at me as if I'd just set myself on fire. "You're more of a man than I am."

And thus he summed up our society's prevailing attitude toward whiskey: It is a man's drink.

So I shouldn't have been surprised a few weeks ago when I saw the new Jameson print ad campaign lining the walls of my subway car. It features a series of old-fashioned illustrations of men doing manly things like dueling in the street and arm wrestling in a tavern. Few women are present, the most prominent of which seems to be the local prostitute. The message is clear -- real men drink Jameson.

Jameson is not alone in its testosterone-fueled ads. Bushmill's current "Since Way Back" campaign showcases hip men (including ultra-hip musician Bon Iver) hanging out with their equally hip friends. Bushmill's, it seems, is just one of the bros.

And speaking of bros, if you're a fan of Scotch, you can join The Chivas Brotherhood, which brings together "Men who seek and conquer the finer things in life" by giving them access to exclusive events. Judging from photos on the website, women can join the brotherhood, but they will be expected to play foosball.

To be fair, some whiskey makers have tried targeting women. Last Christmas, Jack Daniel's launched their "Spike the Cookies" campaign, which encouraged women to replace various ingredients in their holiday baking with Old No. 7. Because the only way women will consume hard liquor is if it's in dessert.

But maybe JD had the right idea at least. Marketers have been targeting women for decades, recognizing that they usually make most of the purchasing decisions for their households. (Think of Mad Men when Heineken tried to convince the Betty Drapers of America to buy the beer for their husbands.) Today, women account for 85% of all consumer purchases, yet the fairer sex does consume less alcohol, with only 58.3% of women identifying themselves as current drinkers, versus 71.1% of men. But, that number is growing, and shouldn't marketers take advantage of this untapped audience?

Curious, I talked to a friend of mine who, up until recently, worked at a PR firm that represented various spirits companies. He told me that, according to research, women will respond to messages intended for men, but men will not usually respond to messages aimed at women. Of course, this doesn't explain why whiskey companies are so focused on men that they essentially ignore women, but it does make a certain amount of sense. For example, plenty of girls play with Power Rangers or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles dolls, but how many boys play with Barbies? Women watch adventure films, but how many men really enjoy rom-coms? This distinction is so pervasive that J.K. Rowling's publisher urged her to go by her initials, fearing boys wouldn't read novels by a Joanne even if the title character was a Harry.

So, I guess the question isn't why don't whiskey makers pay the ladies any attention but, rather, why do women respond to masculine ads while the reverse doesn't appear to be true? Without getting into a gender studies debate, it is unquestionably more socially acceptable for women to embrace things intended for men, while men are more likely to be ridiculed if they are perceived as feminine. But it's deeper than that. Women who embrace masculine interests are often considered smarter, more laid back, and more fun to be around than their prissier sisters. Consider the woman who prefers sports to shopping? Or drinks whiskey instead of Skinny Girl Margaritas? There is just something cool -- to both sexes -- about a woman who is comfortable being one of the guys.

I've felt this first hand. After all, when my friend told me I was more of a man than he was, I considered it a compliment. On a separate occasion, I gleefully told a waiter that the cranberry bellini he assumed I'd ordered with brunch was, in fact, my boyfriend's. The Bloody Mary was mine.

Do my consumer habits make me a traitor to my sex? Am I playing into marketing messages about what is superior or have marketers simply figured something out that we're ashamed to admit? Regardless of the answer, I like whiskey, and if Jameson ever decides to launch a "Real Women Drink Whiskey" campaign, I'll gladly be the spokesperson.

-Brooke Carey

[Loves it. Ill gladly be the spokesperson as well.]

The Bunny Chronicles

don’t feel sorry for me.
I am a competent, satisfied human being.
be sorry for the others who fidget, complain,
who constantly rearrange their lives like furniture,
juggling mates and attitudes.
their confusion is constant, and it will touch whoever they deal with.
beware of them: one of their key words is “love”
and beware of those who only take instructions from their God,
for they have failed completely to live their own lives.
don’t feel sorry for me because I am alone,
for even at the most terrible moments, humor is my companion.
i am a dog walking backwards
i am a broken banjo
i am a telephone wire strung up in Toledo, Ohio.
i am a man eating a meal this night in the month of September.
put your sympathy aside.
they say water help up Christ:
to come through, you better be nearly as lucky.
-Charles Bukowski

The Bunny Chronicles

Her life was a slow realization that the world was not for her, and that for whatever reason, she would never be happy and honest at the same time. She felt as if she were brimming, always producing and hoarding more love inside her. But there was no release. Table, ivory elephant charm, rainbow, onion, hairdo, mollusk, Shabbos, violence, cuticle, melodrama, ditch, honey, doily … None of it moved her. She addressed her world honestly, searching for something deserving of the volumes of love she knew she had within her, but to each she would have to say, 'I dont love you.'
-Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything is Illuminated

Bahaha

Seth does NOT know my life. Ps. I heart cats. Say something.

Its Always Sunny

Im afraid to wash my harrrrrr.